I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
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