do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
