We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Did I show you my penis last night?
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize