Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I looked at my own cervix.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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