oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Randomize
