:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
