she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Randomize
