Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I'm both gender and math confused
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