He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
i just google imaged poop.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I need moral support for this bender
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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