Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
