how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
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