so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
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