Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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