they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
