i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
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HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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