it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
