Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
