Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Randomize
