i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
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