hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
