Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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