Rock
Scissors
Fuck
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
