here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
only you would photoshop your dick
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Randomize
