you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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