My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
