shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize