arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
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