you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
