let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize
