He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Randomize
