Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
