i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
