doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Randomize
