It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
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