we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
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