we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
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