I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
