When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize