I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Randomize
