Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Randomize
