remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
