Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
