yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
