you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
A+ Viking dick
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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