Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
