Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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