Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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