How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Randomize