i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
