she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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